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記得第一部電影會神奇地決定了性格中的某些事情。那個記得並不代表那是生命當中的第一次觀影經驗,也不是某種品味的表露,而是記憶這件事情本身就是一種立場和態度。這世界上分成兩種人,看蔡明亮電影的人,以及還沒看過蔡明亮電影的人。會記得什麼樣的電影,就會變成什麼樣的大人。-- quoted 【李桐豪小說|瘋狂辦公室】第三回:大導演迷失處子身,小編輯情牽第一次

 

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你很難想像國際知名的蔡明亮,會記得十年前的一些婊子事情。
You could not imagine International acclaimed director Tsai Ming Liang remember such petite/bitchy things 10 years ago:


「希望你們不要寫!但十年前我到XX大學賣票,台下只有六個人。我非常不甘心,演講完還沒下課,我去敲一間一間教室的門,門開了,那些教授都很驚訝:『蔡導,你怎麼在這裡?』『請給我幾分鐘,我要宣傳我的電影。』」
"Please do not write this. But 10 years ago I went to a University to sell movie tickets. There's only 6 people waiting for me in the auditorium. I felt baffled. Shortly after the lecture was over, I went to each classroom to knock on their doors. Professors greeted me with surprise: "Tsai San, what are you doing here?" "Please grant me a few minutes, let me promote my film." I said."


「我去賣票,最喜歡那種帶著小小朋友的家庭了。有一個父親說:『導演,我知道你是誰,好 我要買。但是我的小孩那麼小,看得懂嗎?』我說:『沒關係,我知道你也看不懂啊。』應該讓小朋友從小接受美好的東西,我的東西這麼好,怎麼可以沒人看呢?」
"I love selling tickets to family with little kids.I met a family by chance, the father said: "I know who you are, I would like to buy it. But will my kids understand? They are just kids." "Well, as an adult you wouldn't understand it anyway." Children should expose to great things at an early stage. My art is the just divine, it's offensive to be neglected!"


「我希望小小孩子長大後都可以看我的電影。像我覺得在座的應該都非常年輕,沒看過我幾部電影吧。」
"I wish when children grew up, they'll watch my film. you guys look so young down there, did any one of you even seen my movie?"


可是蔡桑,我不年經了阿,我30歲了阿!我幾乎看過你全部的電影阿(除了《河流》和《郊遊》)!!不能因為我已經老了,你就不在乎老影迷(一種培育完成就不理的概念?),只想開發小屁孩阿!!
But Tsai San, I am no longer a part of youth. I am 30 years old. I am old and ragged with a soul. 
But Tsai San, I seen almost every film of yours!(expect River and Stray Dogs)
You cannot abandon an old fan for some little brats! Oh no I felt you already did!


我還在這裡,可是導演已經跑到別處了。這是我和蔡明亮初次見面的感想。
I am still here. But the director is elsewhere. This is the impression I had, when meeting the director for the first time.


「請你們不要在網路上罵我。或批評我的電影。」導演說。
"Please do not scold me on the Internet, or criticize my film," the director said.


「沒想到導演也是一個婊子。」腦公陪我走出美術館後的感想。
也許這就是他之所以成為蔡明亮的原因吧。
"Who knew, the director is a bitch, too." My husband said, after walking out of the Museum alongside with me.
Maybe being a bitch is a must of being who Tsai San is.

 

 

 

 

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